I mean, a buck seventy-nine versus five bucks is a real gap but six cups of beans is also just... a lot of beans for two people. We tried the dried bean thing for a bit and half the batch sat in the fridge until it went bad, so we probably broke even. Not saying your uncle's wrong, just that the math only works if you actually eat all of it.

Did you find that doing something with your hands helped more than just letting the day pass? I went through the same thing with my son and the first year I just stayed in bed with the covers over my head, which honestly made it worse. The next year I made a small photo album of the few pictures I had and that gave me something to hold onto instead of just staring at the wall. Now I write him a letter every year on his birthday and keep them in a shoebox, and maybe one day he will read them or maybe he won't. The cake you baked and that letter sound like a real way to honor her, and doing it at your own table in your own home matters. It gets a little less heavy each year, not because you forget but because you find your own way to carry it.