I did the EXACT same thing with Terraforming Mars for like two years, kept calling it spreadsheet solitaire and refused to try it. My buddy finally just set it up one night and didn't even ask me, and by the end I was hooked and bought my own copy that week. What worked for me was going in with an open mind and NOT reading the rulebook first, just letting someone who knew the game walk me through a few turns. Once the rules click the whole thing opens up and you see why people love it. For Wingspan, the European expansion is worth it if you're already playing a lot, it adds new birds and end of round goals without changing the base game much. If you're only 5 games in I'd wear out the base game first and then grab it.

What was it about her family not knowing for so long that got to you the most? Like was it the secrecy or just how normal everyone acted while it was happening? I keep thinking I'd want to read more about the people who got caught up in it rather than just the science side.