Took me 7 years to realize I was pushing too hard in reunion

I kept calling my birth mom every week and getting short answers. My therapist finally asked if I was treating her like a package I was trying to deliver on time instead of just letting her set the pace. Anybody else have to unlearn that urgency?

2 comments

2 Comments

drew_grant523d ago

Used to be totally against the whole "let them set the pace" thing. Thought it meant being passive or giving up control. Then I realized I was sending my birth dad these long emails every month and he'd reply with two sentences. Finally stopped and waited for him to reach out first. Took eight months but he eventually called me on my birthday. That silence taught me more than any folder of photos could have.

robinson.quinn4d ago

Man I was so bad about this at first... I remember bringing a whole folder of photos and letters to a coffee date like it was a business meeting or something. She probably thought I was applying for a job instead of trying to reconnect.